ADHD is known for “all or none” thinking, which also translates to “out of sight/out of mind.” It’s basically the reason our infamous desk piles are productive for us. If we put something away in a “safe spot,” we’re guaranteed never to look at it again!
The right amount of color in an organization scheme is similarly distinctive, but, if I color coded everything in my Passion Planner by its due date, as the true bullet journal fanatics will, then nothing would ever be urgent because everything was. In the end, I have two highlight colors only: blue for “due by end of the week,” yellow for “due by the first couple of days of the new week.”
Thanks to histrionicbutterfly of Life As Me, I was reminded of an obvious fact I had still managed to completely overlook: this kind of out-of-sight/out-of-mind” and “all-or-none” thinking can occasionally be neuroprotective. The easiest way to avoid difficulties from two masks falling off when trying to wear them simultaneously is to only ever wear one at a time in the first place! I sent my Partner off to entertain the grandparents-in-law and “revised” my call time extra early. Between not having to put on my “dealing with family is still scary” mask at all and the fact I am still photosensitive and can’t actually make out the audience behind the stage lights even when I want to, it felt like performing normally. I was happy with how the show turned out.
The only thing I was disappointed by in the show was that we didn’t get to play a game called Lyrics Only, which is exactly what it sounds like. Performers must run an entire scene speaking only in lyrics from songs as their answers. I love word games in Improv generally, but I am usually less fond of that one – not because I’m terrible at it in absolute terms, but because I’m terrible at it in relative terms. The audience connects best with lyrics from popular songs, and my musical tastes run a few generations too old for my audience (and me, by my age alone.) The audience usually can tell they are lyrics but don’t quite know the songs to truly appreciate them because they can’t mentally sing along. However, since I usually have the lyrical stylings of someone’s grandmother, I was hoping that I’d get to trot out this “relative” strength the one time I had honest-to-goodness relatives of appropriate age to appreciate in the audience. Alas, it was not to be.
But, overall, things went well. However, “going well” still meant far more “peopling” than I am used to. I’ll write more next week, but for this week I claim the “peopled out” privilege. I also haven’t forgotten that this week remains the week of the b-word that shall not be named and also the one-year anniversary of the most recent reason why that date continues to live in infamy. I did seriously look into taking the advice of another blogger, Vixxy Rose of Crazy Little Things and renting a rage room to “celebrate” that fact, but it seems that the idea is too popular for its own good. The one that would be nearest to me is closed for the next few months while it remodels to accommodate the “unexpectedly high demand!” (Though, when it reopens, it will, I note, let me pay extra to smash some unwanted mementos of my own to my own custom playlist for a little extra. I briefly wondered what soundtrack could ever accompany the 9th Circle of Hell, then realized I had already unintentionally created one in the form of my Zombie Apocalypse playlist from last year.)
Since I can’t go apocalyptic on any remaining evidence of the last year, I guess I’ll fall back on another old standby for this week for when I want to
be an introvert for a week but still post something remain balanced during a frustrating anniversary. I’ll respond to a blog award! This week’s episode is graciously provided by justsaltwriter.
Because I’ve got lyrics (or rather, the lack of the chance to enjoy them on either stage or smash) on the brain and also because the ADHD brain – in addition to being all-or-none – has a tendency to take a very generous interpretation of what qualifies as necessary and sufficient for appropriate storytelling, I’m going to answer all of the questions in the form of Lyrics Only. Why? Because a ) it’s my
birthday blog award and b) I have expended more spoons than recently than usual trying to rein in my tangential ADHD storytelling tendencies to play tour guide in a way that doesn’t literally bounce between three centuries of colonial American history within five minutes – with a dash of subway sociology thrown in for good measure. I’m letting my tangential flag fly here in recompense.
1. How do you define life?
2. Based on your answer in 1. above, how often do you think about death?
But there’s no sense crying over every mistake
You just keep on trying till you run out of cake
And the science gets done
And you make a neat gun
For the people who are still alive
Why yes, I did keep it to the same song. Because I make things hard on myself. Also, sometimes the cake feels like a lie. That’s ok, but try to hang on because some cake, at least, isn’t a lie.
3. If you had a clone, would you be pleased in telling him/her your life secrets? And how would you accomplish the task of reassuring him/her that everything is going to pan out alright when he/she is about to give up on life?
4. If beauty was defined in terms of a moment, what/how will it be?
5. Between cooking and eating, what’s best, on the assumption that none of the two is obligatory?
Umm, both? Training to become a world-famous chef?
6. Do you believe life is a function of fate or destiny (note: destiny is the direct antithesis of fate.)
I’m still not sure I understand how fate and destiny are antithetical, so I’ll just put these lyrics up here and let my readers decide which side they represent.
7. If you were to write five-line poetry for that one person in your life, how would it look like?
Ok, this one is fun enough to also warrant a real answer. I’ll try to write my own poem, too, even though it isn’t a lyric anymore:
Hey you, I love you more than salt.
Not quite, as I rethink I halt.
You say to mine own self be true.
Salt makes food – lifeblood of ‘I do’
I love it more – but so do you!
8. What experience in your life shaped you the most?
9. What do you do to relax?
10. What is the strangest food you have ever eaten?
*That refers to cat food, btw. If you were thinking anything else, shame on you! I’m an animal lover!
11. If money, health restrictions, family and career obligations, etc. were not an issue, where in the world would you like to travel to, for how long, and why?
12. Are you an indoors, or an outdoors, person?
I love the outdoors, but I usually have to stay indoors in summer. Dysautonomia + heat = not fun!
13. What is scarier to you: speaking in front of a gathering of children, or a gathering of adults?
14. Define family.
Those lyrics work for family-by-choice. If we’re speaking of families of origin, I change my answer, rather predictably, to:
Need a recap of anything I’m talking about in any post? Check out the Glossary of Terms.