Top Ten Things I Hate About Top Ten Posts

I went away to a place that was not the 9th Circle of Hell this past long weekend with my partner. It was just a long-weekend getaway, and - given that my Partner had literally been to Hell the week before - it doesn't quite imply everything is fine. However, it was enough of a …

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Uh Oh, Spaghetti-Ohs!

You know what they say: if you're stuck in bowl hole, don't keep pigging digging. I grabbed a few spoons - and I don't mean of the good kind - and dug in this week. That's the nature of executive dysfunction coupled with a tendency to dissociate. I am not the best at self-care in …

Messages in a Bottle #9: The Archivist

This CW is so important it should be in neon flashing lights. This is a serious post. Serious like: mentions of 9th Circle of Hell current systemic abuse, mentions of the same kind of systemic abuse on another blog, and mentions of past suicidal feelings and coercive control. I really meant it when I said …

Improv #11: I’m Mrs. Bright Blogs

*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "The Bright Side" "The Bright Side Who?" "The Bright Side Who Doesn't Actually Exist" "Oh. Then I guess this is just another dissociative conversation with the bully-in-my-brain, then?" "You catch on not quickly at all, don't you? Also, your joke sucks." I'm fairly sure the first rule of building a blog …

Tools of the Trade Show

CW: Panic attacks in progress and the reasons for them. So, this is not the type of post I normally write. I'm not even sure it qualifies as a true post. If this were Facebook, I'd be vaguebooking to the point of parody. However, I will explain more later, when I feel able to and …

Remote Control

If a bully-of-a-boss screams in an office, and there is no Lavender around to hear it, can he still control her amygdalar fear response? We're about to find out. I am now a 100% remote employee?! I've spent my not-FMLA completing a crash course in processing a lifetime of trauma alongside dealing with the concurrent 9th …

Blog Awards Series #4: Mamas, Don’t Let Your Blogs Grow Up to Be About Cowboys

Anyone who ever thinks that the ADHD brain can be turned off has never had to deal with one while blind for a week. The days of wearing an eye mask on doctor's orders did help me get more sleep than normal. It's logical to fall asleep when it's dark all the time anyway, but …

Improv #10: Seven Things for Self-Care

*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Seven" "Seven Who?" "Seven Eleven..." "Dude, you can't fool me. I know there's only seven of you. When I'm seeing eleven then maybe I'll believe I'm as think as my friends drunk I am. Now bring me my black coffee and tylenol delivery stat!" There's an Improv game called Five Things …

For Better or Worse

CW: Anonymity is so inconvenient sometimes. I can't, for instance, tell you the actual state motto of the 9th Circle of Hell. "Abandon Hope, All Ye Who Enter Here," while appropriate, is actually not nearly as morbidly satisfying as the true state motto. If I ever write a memoir of my experiences in Hell - …

Frozen in Time

CW: Don't read this if you are in any sort of a bad place. I'm physically safe. I'm mentally shattered. You don't need to do anything. There's nothing anyone can do anyway unless they had serious political connections. I am not a danger to myself or others. No, the danger, as always, is from others, …