Broken mirrors

"She always did put too much of herself into her creations..." My name is Lavender. I'm chronically ill, neurodiverse, a geek, a sometimes comedienne (intentionally or otherwise), a foodie and I (burnout aside) care a lot about social justice. And the WordPress community. I used to know how to talk about trauma. And, I will … Continue reading Broken mirrors


Seeking Asylum in Faerun

11/7 Update: I formally welcome Pennsylvania back into New JersMaPennsRicutaware. Thank you. That is all! (For now!) My husband's first cousin - one of the ones we just don't speak to - got covid recently. He's younger than us, and he worked in a physically demanding job and was proud of the physical condition he … Continue reading Seeking Asylum in Faerun

The Third of November

Last year, I wrote a poem for our local U.S. election day. It is here. Local elections remain very important, so don't forget to vote for down-ballot races, as well, as you vote for U.S. President. But, for all in the U.S., please don't forget to #MakeAPlanToVote. Election day is November 3rd. Vote. Democracy is … Continue reading The Third of November

Where’s Whoopsie #26: If Everything isn’t On Fire, I Must Be Missing Something…

I haven't posted a Where's Whoopsie in awhile. Apparently without live improv to afford me extensive time on public transit and in coffee shops, I don't draw much. My Partner noticed this and suggested I should prioritize doing something "creative" to ward off seasonal - and election and "in the house too often without other … Continue reading Where’s Whoopsie #26: If Everything isn’t On Fire, I Must Be Missing Something…

Never Let a Good Crisis Go to Write

Many things have been said about last night's U.S. presidential debate. The Times in the UK said of it: "The clearest loser from the first presidential debate between Donald Trump and Joe Biden was America." The Guardian described it as a "national humiliation." Dan Rather at News and Guts wrote: "Who won and lost tonight … Continue reading Never Let a Good Crisis Go to Write

Compassion is Not a Zero-Sum Game

CW: Descriptions of multiple types of systemic abuse and personal crises. Be safe while reading! The Poor People's Mass Assembly and Moral March on Washington is happening today. It has been planned for two years to draw attention to the plight of the poor and of systemic racism in the U.S. I wish I had … Continue reading Compassion is Not a Zero-Sum Game

We Should All Be Tired

"I’m so very, very tired" I first heard this spoken by a colleague of color this week trying to explain the toll that seeing yet one more blatant murder of a black man in America had taken on him. Then I saw it posted by others of color on Facebook. Then, once I'd seen it … Continue reading We Should All Be Tired

Our New Normal

This month is always a weird time for me. Too many negative memories all clustered in one frustrating birth month. So, it's no surprise in hindsight, I suppose, why I've been feeling more dissociated, weird and generally "floaty" than normal recently. I always feel more dissociated, weird and generally "floaty" on Hallmark holidays, during my … Continue reading Our New Normal

Putting a (telephone) ring on it?

CW: Discussions of evangelical religious beliefs and horrible beliefs about the causes of, and appropriate responses to, covid-19. Discussions of managing challenging relationships with Partner's high-risk older evangelical grandparents as his birth state re-opens. Reminders that - while we have been fortunate (so far) not to have anyone we personally know have had covid-19 severely … Continue reading Putting a (telephone) ring on it?

Do We Really Need to Put a Label on Things?

Useful Background Knowledge: As of the time of this writing, our county has more confirmed covid-19 cases than over two-thirds of all U.S. states.*We don't own a car. This makes "avoiding public transportation or ride-share services" challenging. Our "primary medical provider" is one of those commuter rail trips we are supposed to avoid if we … Continue reading Do We Really Need to Put a Label on Things?