ACE in the Hole

CW: Discussions of childhood ACES. Mentions of alcohol use and verbal abuse during childhood. Read safely! Partner (on phone): "'Always,' 'Never,' 'I don't know how to answer that. It was 'Always' when we still lived there, but 'Never' now because we have public transportation? Well, okay, not 'Never.' Public transportation isn't perfect out here, and … Continue reading ACE in the Hole

Compassion is Not a Zero-Sum Game

CW: Descriptions of multiple types of systemic abuse and personal crises. Be safe while reading! The Poor People's Mass Assembly and Moral March on Washington is happening today. It has been planned for two years to draw attention to the plight of the poor and of systemic racism in the U.S. I wish I had … Continue reading Compassion is Not a Zero-Sum Game

Improv #22/Where’s Whoopsie #25: Middling Management

"If-then statements: 'If we do X, then Y not?" "Bread Metaphor --> 'engage the clients in the discussion'" What does this even mean? I have absolutely no idea! These are actual notes I took about some meeting recently. I give it even odds whether it was work or improv, though, as I've seen a couple … Continue reading Improv #22/Where’s Whoopsie #25: Middling Management

Our New Normal

This month is always a weird time for me. Too many negative memories all clustered in one frustrating birth month. So, it's no surprise in hindsight, I suppose, why I've been feeling more dissociated, weird and generally "floaty" than normal recently. I always feel more dissociated, weird and generally "floaty" on Hallmark holidays, during my … Continue reading Our New Normal

Putting a (telephone) ring on it?

CW: Discussions of evangelical religious beliefs and horrible beliefs about the causes of, and appropriate responses to, covid-19. Discussions of managing challenging relationships with Partner's high-risk older evangelical grandparents as his birth state re-opens. Reminders that - while we have been fortunate (so far) not to have anyone we personally know have had covid-19 severely … Continue reading Putting a (telephone) ring on it?

Real Pandemics Have Curves

CW: Present-day mentions of covid-19 that are in line with the dark humor I have previously established when discussing the 9th Circle of Hell, but that hopefully take the situation appropriately seriously and respectfully. My Partner and I fully support efforts in the past 24-48 hours to responsibly #FlattenTheCurve. Discussions of counterfactual scenarios the U.S. … Continue reading Real Pandemics Have Curves

Love in the Time of Corona

CW: Covid-19 as filtered through an Evangelical world view. People behaving badly out of fear. Mentions of past loss of family members who didn't seek medical treatment. General saltiness about all of the above. You know the old saying. Family: you can't live with them, and... Wait. Was there supposed to be a second half … Continue reading Love in the Time of Corona

“Lavender, Where Are You?”

CW: Descriptions of childhood emotional abuse. There will come a point in 2020 when I can officially say that I have lived longer outside the 9th Circle of Hell than I have within it. I will not, unfortunately, be concurrently able to say that I have spent more time outside of Hell than I have … Continue reading “Lavender, Where Are You?”

Cantrips and Catechisms

CW: Mentions of Southern Evangelical religious beliefs that are pretty darn scary and in my mind qualify as genuine trauma. Also mentions of other forms of childhood trauma. All from the past, though, not the present. So, don’t worry! I promised….about two months ago...to tell the story of how I unmasked about trauma and neurodiversity … Continue reading Cantrips and Catechisms

No Praise Like Home

You know how trauma workbooks commonly offer a warning to stop, to practice self-care, and to return to a chapter at a future time if any material in it becomes too triggering? I have never paid much attention to those warnings, even during those years when my mistrust of the system was so intense that … Continue reading No Praise Like Home