ACE in the Hole

CW: Discussions of childhood ACES. Mentions of alcohol use and verbal abuse during childhood. Read safely! Partner (on phone): "'Always,' 'Never,' 'I don't know how to answer that. It was 'Always' when we still lived there, but 'Never' now because we have public transportation? Well, okay, not 'Never.' Public transportation isn't perfect out here, and … Continue reading ACE in the Hole

Compassion is Not a Zero-Sum Game

CW: Descriptions of multiple types of systemic abuse and personal crises. Be safe while reading! The Poor People's Mass Assembly and Moral March on Washington is happening today. It has been planned for two years to draw attention to the plight of the poor and of systemic racism in the U.S. I wish I had … Continue reading Compassion is Not a Zero-Sum Game

We Should All Be Tired

"I’m so very, very tired" I first heard this spoken by a colleague of color this week trying to explain the toll that seeing yet one more blatant murder of a black man in America had taken on him. Then I saw it posted by others of color on Facebook. Then, once I'd seen it … Continue reading We Should All Be Tired

Our New Normal

This month is always a weird time for me. Too many negative memories all clustered in one frustrating birth month. So, it's no surprise in hindsight, I suppose, why I've been feeling more dissociated, weird and generally "floaty" than normal recently. I always feel more dissociated, weird and generally "floaty" on Hallmark holidays, during my … Continue reading Our New Normal

Putting a (telephone) ring on it?

CW: Discussions of evangelical religious beliefs and horrible beliefs about the causes of, and appropriate responses to, covid-19. Discussions of managing challenging relationships with Partner's high-risk older evangelical grandparents as his birth state re-opens. Reminders that - while we have been fortunate (so far) not to have anyone we personally know have had covid-19 severely … Continue reading Putting a (telephone) ring on it?

It Can’t Happen Here?

CW: American eugenics in the time of corona. States announcing they will deny life-saving treatment to corona patients if they have disabilities such as "Down syndrome, cerebral palsy, autism and other such conditions." For anyone who has ever said, "it can't happen here..." Yes, it can. And it has already (as you will well know … Continue reading It Can’t Happen Here?

Real Pandemics Have Curves

CW: Present-day mentions of covid-19 that are in line with the dark humor I have previously established when discussing the 9th Circle of Hell, but that hopefully take the situation appropriately seriously and respectfully. My Partner and I fully support efforts in the past 24-48 hours to responsibly #FlattenTheCurve. Discussions of counterfactual scenarios the U.S. … Continue reading Real Pandemics Have Curves

Love in the Time of Corona

CW: Covid-19 as filtered through an Evangelical world view. People behaving badly out of fear. Mentions of past loss of family members who didn't seek medical treatment. General saltiness about all of the above. You know the old saying. Family: you can't live with them, and... Wait. Was there supposed to be a second half … Continue reading Love in the Time of Corona

“Lavender, Where Are You?”

CW: Descriptions of childhood emotional abuse. There will come a point in 2020 when I can officially say that I have lived longer outside the 9th Circle of Hell than I have within it. I will not, unfortunately, be concurrently able to say that I have spent more time outside of Hell than I have … Continue reading “Lavender, Where Are You?”

Where’s Whoopsie #25/Improv #19: Hazy Shade of Waiting

Does an afternoon of quiet relaxation in a cafe with a journal, a sketchpad, a kindle, and some hot chocolate sound like bliss to you? More importantly, does it actually yield bliss for you? Because I have learned that the gulf between "sounds like" and "is" is about as wide as the gulf between my … Continue reading Where’s Whoopsie #25/Improv #19: Hazy Shade of Waiting